Your Favorite Shark Tanks

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New year, same old users

It's end-of-year crunch time, and this order system's database is full. "We have to purge it and shrink it, like, yesterday," says IT pilot fish, "or our system is going to run like a snail until we do. Problem is, we find out our backups have been failing. The DBA doesn't have space for the backup and is having a technical issue backing up to a mount point. After everyone is apprised of the situation, the technical VP sends the following e-mail: 'What's the downside of purging without a good database backup?' "

That's why

This pilot fish watches as a new server is installed upstairs at the warehouse where he works. "All wiring had to be installed through the ceiling 25 feet up," says fish. "Our IT tech, who is brilliant with this, asked if I could do the wiring. I told him I don't have the skills for that. 'No problem,' he said, and walked me through it." Once the job is done and the server is working fine, fish is curious: Why pick me for this? he asks. IT tech: "I have a fear of heights."

Right on schedule

Pilot fish is vetting scheduling software and sets up a demo with the vendor whose product looks the most promising. But to his surprise, a week before the appointment, the vendor's rep shows up. It's a simple mistake; the rep misread his appointment calendar. But since I'm here, can I do the demo anyhow? he asks. "I told him it's fine with me," says fish, "but I don't know how to explain to my co-workers that a vendor selling scheduling software showed up a week early. He smiled, apologized and showed up the next week -- as scheduled."

Oops!

Pilot fish at this start-up develops an online application that involves a file library download. "During testing, I use a small, fast-downloading stock image of a monkey for my test download file," says fish. "When the application is working without errors, it gets handed off to marketing and quality control for peer testing, and then the executive VP of marketing gives the order to go live." But the VP has neglected to supply the file library that's actually supposed to be downloaded. And when the first customer downloads the "library," the puzzled call to customer support is inevitable: "Is this what I get for $200? A picture of a monkey?"

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